Cassquatch is an indian?

I believe DJ's joke was a play on Sasquatch.

According to Merriam-Webster.com:
Main Entry: Sas·quatch
Pronunciation: 'sas-"kwach, -"kwäch
Function: noun
Etymology: Halkomelem (Salishan language of southwestern British Columbia) sésq'&c
: a hairy creature like a human being reported to exist in the northwestern United States and western Canada and said to be a primate between 6 and 15 feet (1.8 and 4.6 meters) tall -- called also bigfoot.

In other words, not an indian. Boo, Laura Judy, Boo.

According to DJ:
Main Entry: Cass·quatch
Pronunciation: 'cass-"kwach, -"kwäch
Function: noun
Etymology: English (not Queen's)
: a hairy creature like a human being reported to exist in the plains United States hailing from Southeastern United States and said to be a primate with huge feet (1.8 and 4.6 meters) -- called also Cassie.

Now maybe if he'd said Cassagawea, or Cassahontas, but those don't make any sense as we were talking about feet.

It's called a snake.

You know scientists are trying to hard when this is the headline:

"Limbless lizard found"
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/18919206/?GT1=9951

I didn't actually read the article because snakes (or lizards without limbs) make me sick. A moose is just a deer with a bigger hat.

One of 'those' days...

...created exclusively for me by 'them, they, those bastards'.

Today wasn't the worst thing ever. Not even close.

Here, let's put it in perspective using today's political environment and a little pop-culture.
-I was never shot at today. Not by an American soldier, Iraqi, Al Qaeda or gang-member. Not even a pissed off student.
-I was not insulted today by Rosie O'Donnell, Donald Trump or even Elizabeth Hasselbeck.
-I was not questioned or forced to debate at any point today. Not over political or personal decisions I've made.
-No one has claimed my novel to be the work of the devil and asked it to be banned from elementary schools' libraries and reading lists.

Ok - so all that being said - here's how my day went:

Woke up. (problem #1 with my day :) )
The cute banker at the bank (obviously) is still married. And still shakes hands a bit too firmly.
Ingrid (Husqvarna lawnmower) had a dead battery. After instruction via cell phone with Jeff, she is charging.
I decide to move on to mowing the pool area which doesn't employ Ingrid, but instead an old fashioned push mower with a bag. I can't start said mower.
Call to dad. Dad informs of location of prime. Primed is pumped? Is that a sentence? Pulling the starter string while talking to dad is a mistake. Said cell phone (attached to my hip or ear for the past 2 years) goes flying. Broken cell phone. Lawnmower starts.
Call to Verizon for replacement phone. Told by useful customer service rep that her hands are tied and I should look for a deal on EBay.
Visit with USCellular here in town reveals that it would be cheaper to cancel plan with Verizon and get new plan with USCellular for a new phone. Sad but true. I agree and sign papers.
Call to Verizon. I'm forwarded to the loyalty department who agrees to send me a phone nicer than the one I just bought at USCellular. For free. I just have to wait 2 days. I can do that for free-ness.
Visit with USCellular to back out of contract signed 2 hours early. Luckily they agree.
Trip to Pioneer to buy new battery for Ingrid. Old one would never charge.
Home to find cranky campers upset that I took my lunch, because they want to check in before check-in time. (That's right - this is all before 1:00 pm).
Cranky campers distract me and I lose important bolts for installing new battery.
"Screw it!" I will mow with old cruddy green riding lawn mower. Which won't start.
At this point, I give up and watch Dr. Phil and Oprah.
Luckily Jeff was able to supply new bolts. Tomorrow I will mow. Tonight I will enjoy Margaritas. And be grateful that Donald Trump never insulted me.

This picture...

...makes my feet look big. But the point is I hung my hammock. I have a hammock at my job! Jealous?

And two more of tiny Potsy eating Big dog food so cute :)

good books

Hello all!

So I'm Alone again (naturally). That's not as sad as it sounds - just a song lyric that fits. My parental units will be back in about a month and as long as we don't flood or have any major problem between now and then, life will feel pretty normal around here.

Anyway - the obvious subject of this post-good books. Mary Lawson: Crow Lake and The other side of the Bridge. Both very good - even if she is a durn Canadian. Not that there's anything wrong with that!

Cuter Potsy

Maybe I am dumb but will you just look at her!

Mr. Potsworthy!!!

Mr. Potsworthy has arrived!!! She is a baby girl of just 6 weeks, who loves to sleep in laps! I will call her simply Potsy!

Holy RV Clubbers, Batman!

Ka-pow! Jachang!

These are the noises I make when being knocked out by RV clubmembers! We are infested with more than just mosquitoes as of today. We checked in at least 13 people today (AND it's only 2:30 - 4.5 more hours til quittin' time). Gettin Bizee! I feel like this is the first time since 10:00 that I've sat for a solid 20 minutes! Gracie ate my lunch today!

Responding to comments:

The Pool- is full and the pump is pumping and soon there will be swimmers in it :) I hope I get to be one of them. I was working the other day, on the pool in shorts and a bikini top and the city apparently got calls about the white thing on Buckeye making it difficult to drive due to glare. I was ashamed.

The Convicts- Of course I gave them my number, but I will never answer if the Caller ID says "Dickinson County Prison". I learned this from Laura Judy, the great phone avoider.

The Water-wings- a necessity.

The Swim Diapers- Also a necessity in cases of flooding as most certainly we will not be able to use conventional waste facilities. So I will be wearing Swim Diapers. Those who won't, disgust me. Mine will have Eeyore on them. Poor Eeyore. Those who have Pooh on their diapers, disgust me.

The Entertainment- The idea of posing as an escaped convict at any point other than Halloween (at which time I would try to be a Sexy Escaped Convict) for entertainment is hare-brained at best. Boo, Laura Judy, boo.

The requested update!

Well we didn't get washed away. But it does seem like things got a little busy and I got a little lazy.

As of Tuesday last week, we were worried...the water was still coming (people all over town were singing "How high's the water, mama?") and the building next to us - which sits at least 2 feet above us - was majorly sandbagged. So if they flooded, we would be wearing waterwings and swim diapers. Luckily for us, the county was giving out sandbags. I was sent to get 15. Here's how that conversation/event went:

Setting: 'County yard' office
Players:
Men
Cassie, an awkward girl

Cassie: Hi, I heard you were giving away sandbags....
Man 1: Uh... do you want them to have sand in them?
Cassie: Oh! Yes!
Man 1: Hmm... maybe they can help you in there.
Points Cassie deeper into the Den of Strange Men. Follows her.
Cassie: Hi, I was looking for free sandbags, with sand in them.
Man 1: Guffaw!
Man 2: Nothin's free here. They are $1.25 a piece.
Cassie: Oh.
Man 2: Just kidding.
All Men: Guffaw!
Man 2: Go over there to the pile of sand, they'll set you up.
Cassie (sheepishly): Thanks.

Over by the pile of sand, Cassie encounters a gaggle of convicts willing to load her Toyota Tacoma with a mere 15 sandbags. They also guffaw! as they wonder if it can carry such a load. Although Cassie leaves with no actual phone numbers, she is already formulating the joke that will be told about picking up some men that are hardworkers, even if they will be a little slow in calling her.

The End

Thank you, thank you!

The jokes and the awkward-ness were enjoyed by all.
Eventually we ended up using 159 sandbags, all with sand in them, to surround the bath-house and protect the renovations done earlier in the spring. From nothing. It did rain and the water did get high and the farms surrounding the rivers and creeks were washed out but nothing came to us. I didn't get to go handfishing in the playground. Oh, well. We took the sandbags down and now things are back to normal. If you call a town smelling like dead fish, infested with mosquitos and the occasional recliner in the occasional wheat field normal.

Mom and Dad have been here for a week now and it has been very nice. For one thing I've gotten tons of external validation (Cassie seeking...) as they have seen that I haven't burned the place down. For another, it's been very nice having some helpers; I've been running errands, cut my mowing time in half and having some time away occasionally as mom or dad watches the office. A third benefit: someone else to cook dinner and eat together!

This reminds me - Happy Mother's Day to all the moms. I hope it was a great, great day for you!

Anyway, this update seems to have run a bit long. Comments?

Weather or not...

So I should be working...or eating (it is noon here). But I've got to blog about the weather lately. Most of you have probably heard about the crazy tornado that hit Southeastern Kansas - luckily nothing even close to that bad has hit near Abilene, but it has been really really rainy. Rainy like I can't even describe. So the river that is carrying all of this rain that has hit the area out is predicted to crest Tuesday night or Wednesday morning at 7 feet ABOVE the protective dikes. I have taken a lot of pictures, most of them aren't great, unless you know what level the river should be at, but a couple are good.
Here's what I think are the most descriptive pictures. They say 100 million words, each!



This river is usually pretty empty - called Mud Creek - and is usually about 2 feet deep at most?


This is mud creek showing that it will measure as high as 25 feet and is 21 feet now... with more rain to come. Luckily it empties quickly.



This is another 'little' creek - usually completely empty.



Redneck bass boat = old bath tub and a lawn chair. :) Had to take a picture of that!



This is a fence on a bridge (A guardrail in the big city). The debris is all the way on top of that - so the water was really powerful, fast and deep here.


This is Jeff standing next to where the road has actually washed away.


And this is the culvert that used to be in that hole!

They are predicting the rivers and creeks will crest on Wednesday, so hopefully it doesn't get too bad - although apparently people are getting sandbags.
There are more pictures and a couple of videos that I will post eventually... patience!

(I had to stop and eat lunch in the middle of this blog!)

Benefit of Single-dom Part 2

Believe this (or don't, whatev):

I'm reading a book right now by Garrison Keillor, "The Book of Guys". Reading it is supposed to be fairly representative of guy thinking and behavior, specifically in relationships. The chapter last night had this to say from the viewpoint of a fictional Don Giovanni:

"...a man owes it to himself to stop and consider the three advantages of the single life. One, if you're single, you can think. Two, you can act. Three, you can feel. Probably there are other advantages, but those three surely are important, yes?"

I think the Don may be on something here, but it may pertain to women just as much as men.

Other notes: Reading "The Book of Guys" makes me feel a little like a spy. Is this how boys feel when they sneak a peek at Cosmo or Seventeen? I've never actually known for certain any boys that do this, none that would admit it anyway, but I admit to having looked at GQ or Maxim.

Reading this book does in fact mean I've finished "The Year of Magical Thinking". Tara (and others who may be interested), I'm not sure I recommend it. I didn't even read the last 10 pages, because I thought she had made her point and I just wanted to go to the library. Something to keep in mind. Who knows, maybe in those last 10 pages she healed from the death of her husband and struggles of the past year and went to an amusement park, but I doubt it.

Benefits of Single-dom

Now I am sure there are plenty of these benefits that I cannot even begin to list or think of so feel free to add to the list. In fact, I almost require you marrieds or singles to comment to me with one benefit of single life.

Here's what I've come up with (my favorite is last I think):

1. Shaving... no need to say more
2. Music - play what I want, when I want
3. Flatulence - most days, there is less. (this made me laugh to type)
4. Car seat - no one has messed with my distance or angle to the steering wheel in a long time
5. Dirty dishes in the sink are my dirty dishes. I can't blame anyone but me for them being there, and if I decide to recycle - I know who's germs I'm ingesting.
6. Closet space
7. I am drinking Chocolate milk right now - like a 7-year old, yes - out of a fancy wine glass. And it is delightful.

I once was silent, but now I am loud...

Hellllllllloooooooo... miss me?

Things got downright busy around here! And not in a dirty way - Grandma Rae this is a G-rated blog, you dirty bird!

Sunday, I mowed and killed weeds. So satisfying killin'. And I shaved Vixie - she is sporting her new summer cut and has a young, sassy attitude to go along with it!

Monday, I worked all the live-long day with Rod building wind-breaks for the bathrooms. Ah, pouring concrete and digging out rocks - not quite as satisfying as killin', but when Rod said "I think we're done until Fall" I have to admit that it made me pretty durn happy!

Yesterday was rainy and so most of the day was spent in-the-doors and I did laundry money and paperwork stuff. Laundry money sounds like it might be fun, but really gathering up $$$ in quarters and going through each one - not that much fun by yourself, maybe if you had a Quarter Party, it could be awesome. I have to look through each one because my mom is collecting the new state quarters for each of us kids. (We are also probably collecting fecal matter and diseases by touching each of those quarters.)

Today was another rainy day and I spent all afternoon putting stuff on Ebay. My life is so hard!

Here's a picture of Vixie's new haircut - it looks best on dogs with pointy heads and curly tails. Beppo's picture is just because we don't want to play favorites - she gets really stinkin' jealous.