My two faces

So I think (I hope) we all have at least 2 faces. I definitely do. I don't have secrets (well, I do... but they won't be revealed on the interwebs anytime soon, I hope.) But I do have facets I keep hidden. Mostly out of fear and societal pressures. I have a stong fear of judgement - from potential in-laws (not you Tara - but Todd's parents). After the debacle with Hricko's parents, I feel like it's too easy to hate me if you don't agree or appreciate my facets. Or fear of judgement from people who barely know me but are Facebook 'friends'. I shouldn't care. But I don't want people to think they have a full picture of me based on one status or silly statement. It wouldn't be the first time it happened. Anyway - here are some of my hidden 'things' facets or things I want to share but don't.

Sometimes, when I sit down on 'strange' toilets I feel like they are too short, and then I think I'm a giant. And I so gradually became a giant, that even I didn't notice. And then I think don't ever tell anyone this.

Sometimes, when I see someone with a cast I want to punch them or push them over, just to see if it would hurt. And sometimes I want to do it to cast an air of intimidation.

Sometimes I hear a song lyric and I want to spread the word about the great song. Even if it doesn't really represent my mood or even the music that I typically like.

Sometimes, I have very childish urges - like the great idea to pull the fire alarm. I would never act on them, but then I think - what if I thought about it so much I accidentally did it.

I also have the tendency to have day-mares. It's like daydreams, but I will think of something bad and then I will think of all the outcomes and when I find the worst, then I will imagine my response, then the next bad thing will happen, then my reaction and so on. I can spend hours playing this game.

When I try to do something, and I fail or am in the process of failing or look back and think I failed, I want to give up. I don't think I quit easily but I think I get frustrated easily.

I have trust issues.

I think that's all I want to share for now. Feel free to respond with some of your craziness.